Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
