its not stalking. its research.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
either way he was missing a nipple.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Even my vagina gasped.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Randomize
