You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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