Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
