Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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