I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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