and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
