So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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