her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize