Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
