It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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