Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
