I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize