I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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