i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
