Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Vodka?
Forever.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
