they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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