R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
