as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize