Having a random hookup so left but love u
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
