Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize