At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
