Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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