it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
someone owes me an orgasm
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize