Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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