You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
