She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
