2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
