What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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