I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Is it because I queefed?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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