For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
