Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
