I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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