I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
