That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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