Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
