it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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