Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
