Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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