in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
