Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
