Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize