are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
