you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
