ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Randomize
