Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
