it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
it's great music for shaving your balls
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
