Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
