Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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