Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
