some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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