No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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